Food Mascots: Which Could You Beat and Which Would Kick Your Ass?

[Phil]

Link:

[Drew a Penalty]

I feel like Ronald McDonald is overrated here while Mr. Peanut is underrated. I’m not scared of Ronald McDonald doing anything more than touching me weird. Mr. Peanut has definitely broken up a few unions and has probably beaten a person or two with that cane. I wouldn’t fuck with him.

 

I also think they’re selling the yellow M&M short. While characterized as being less intelligent than the red M&M, that peanut interior is gonna be harder than red’s chocolate interior. I think he lasts a little longer in a fight.

[LindG1000]

This is 10 kinds of fucked. George Washington selling oats is still tougher than tough. There's empirical proof that the Pillsbury Doughboy can fight like a motherfucker. And the Golden Grahams bear? Fuckin wuss bear.

[Drew a Penalty]

This is 10 kinds of fucked. George Washington selling oats is still tougher than tough. There's empirical proof that the Pillsbury Doughboy can fight like a motherfucker. And the Golden Grahams bear? Fuckin wuss bear.

 

Quakers are pacfisits. If you're getting beat up by one then you might as well have the Gerber baby put you of your misery with its blanket.

[josh]

You know Tony is a bitch. That’s why he’s hanging out with kids.

 

How tall is the “giant”? For some reason, I always remember the little tiny cartoon green guy.

 

I think uncle Ben is underrated.

[Phil]

Where's Kool-Aid man rank? I feel like he's so fuckin' big he'd just crush you. Or drown you. Even though he probably can't fight.

[Pete]

Where's Sta-Puft in this?

[Phil]

Which sized version?

[josh]

Where's Kool-Aid man rank? I feel like he's so fuckin' big he'd just crush you. Or drown you. Even though he probably can't fight.

 

He does smash through walls, but I think I have the endurance. Plus he’s got a glass chin.

[Pete]

Which sized version?

The only one that matters, dawg.

[BrooksBurner]

He does smash through walls, but I think I have the endurance. Plus he’s got a glass chin.

 

Lmfao

[Phil]

The only one that matters, dawg.

 

Oh, he fuckin' up everyone.

[Phil]

He does smash through walls, but I think I have the endurance. Plus he’s got a glass chin.

 

Yeah, but that glass goes through brick unscathed. You're gonna shatter your hand even trying.

[josh]

im very experience at breaking things made of Pyrex, too

[Ozzy]

I'd be afraid of Chef Boyardee...he might break out a rolling pin or a frying pan and bash me in the head. The Trix Rabbit needs such an ass kickin' though. I'd fucking rag doll his ass like I was Tom Wilson....(Whooops, too soon!!)

 

Sugar Bear is just too cool...I'd take him as a tag team partner and gang up on Captain Crunch.