Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 I know, I know, but this isn't really a crisis thread... Actually, it's been bothering me for years actually. What do you do if your father supposedly isn't telling your mother the truth? It's a money situation. I spoke with him about it, but I feel like he's lying to me too... he's stubborn. They've been fighting for years. I know you're all going to say why did I come here to post it but let me be honest - my whole family is fucked up. We barely have any, so I can't reach out to anyone. Plus my brother, sister, and I can't even ask my parents for advice because they're always mad. Sorry, but I know you guys are pretty smart, we have intelligent guys here who can help in situations like this, and I rather post this here than get answers from other websites lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Well what's the situation? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
josh Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Ignore it. Don't take sides among family members unless it's an extremely serious matter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 Hmmm I guess it's kind of personal, but I don't mind sharing. My dad might lose his job again, and we're fucked. My dad has the money (borrowing from my grandmother, his mom) to co-open a pizzeria in Park slope. So, now, my mom is scared he'll lose money from his pocket as well. So supposedly he took my mom off the chase credit card that they had a joint in, and changed the address to my grandmother's house in SI. No idea why, but he's telling my mom that he cancelled it. But my mom is saying chase called saying we have a 3,000 bill to pay? But my dad is saying that he has no idea what that is and she shouldn't worry. My mom is freaking out, has no idea what the hell to do Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Sounds like there is gasoline everywhere and you're asking us if we think it's a good idea for you to light a match. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 Ignore it. Don't take sides among family members unless it's an extremely serious matter. It's kind of bad when my sister is always upset about it too though. Plus her future kind of depends on this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shane Falco Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Sounds like there is gasoline everywhere and you're asking us if we think it's a good idea for you to light a match. :word: If possible offer some insight on the matter, but make it clear you're not taking sides whatsoever. Or just stay out of it all together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 :word: If possible offer some insight on the matter, but make it clear you're not taking sides whatsoever. Or just stay out of it all together. I did. Problem is my parents are both stubborn and think the kids need to get involved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 I did. Problem is my parents are both stubborn and think the kids need to get involved. Then you need to reiterate that THEIR finances aren't YOUR business. Then, move out as soon as you're able. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chizz Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 It sounds like you're in a lose/lose situation right now. Maybe you should have a sit-down with your brother and sister and discuss it amongst yourselves. Go through a few scenarios that are likely to happen and have a plan for each. You all should get on the same page to avoid any more confusion throughout the family. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
josh Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Stay out of it, man. Tell them you want to sort out their issues, but that's it. Financial disagreements are pretty serious, but they need to be addressed by those involved. Once you get in, you can't get out. God forbid this leads to a seperation or divorce, and the last thing you want is to lose relationships with your immediate family. I know several people that were in your shoes that chose a side and no longer have communication with a mother/father/sister/uncle/etc, even if there was not divorce or split. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 Then you need to reiterate that THEIR finances aren't YOUR business. Then, move out as soon as you're able. Dude, I wish I could move out. There is no fucking way I can pay rent for an apartment. I mean, what is the cheapest you can get on an apartment? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 Stay out of it, man. Tell them you want to sort out their issues, but that's it. Financial disagreements are pretty serious, but they need to be addressed by those involved. Once you get in, you can't get out. God forbid this leads to a seperation or divorce, and the last thing you want is to lose relationships with your immediate family. I know several people that were in your shoes that chose a side and no longer have communication with a mother/father/sister/uncle/etc, even if there was not divorce or split. Plus, it's horrible when all of your family is gone pretty much. No one really keeps in contact anymore. All I have are my friends (barely now) and my girlfriend (and god forbid anything happened there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Dude, I wish I could move out. There is no fucking way I can pay rent for an apartment. I mean, what is the cheapest you can get on an apartment? Doesn't need to be now, just as soon as you're able. Or get a roommate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 Doesn't need to be now, just as soon as you're able. Or get a roommate. True. I can always find a roommate, even if it's random? Not sure how comfortable I'd feel. I have 1 year and a half left of school most likely then I graduate. Hopefully I can find a sustainable job that pays pretty well and I can probably go for my masters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 I thought we already got rid of his girlfriend because she cheated or something. If your parents are trying to drag you into their financial mess, take Peetie's advice. Move out asap. And don't wait for the perfect situation to do it. Just find a way. Sleep on someone's couch or something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 I thought we already got rid of his girlfriend because she cheated or something. If your parents are trying to drag you into their financial mess, take Peetie's advice. Move out asap. And don't wait for the perfect situation to do it. Just find a way. Sleep on someone's couch or something. She didn't cheat on me lol, just had a little discussion with her ex and I didn't know about me. Yeah, I might actually ask my friend actually - once he's back from Italy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 She didn't cheat on me lol, just had a little discussion with her ex and I didn't know about me. Yeah, I might actually ask my friend actually - once he's back from Italy. Sounds shaddy. I'd ditch her before she gives you an STD. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 Sounds shaddy. I'd ditch her before she gives you an STD. LOL. I'd throw her in a ditch. That's all I need in my life besides the other shit I got going on - a STD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chizz Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 I really dont think you need to do something as drastic as moving out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 I really dont think you need to do something as drastic as moving out. I do. If I wanted to get more personal, I'd go more into detail. I can't stand my parents at this point Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 This shouldn't be the reason you move out, just one of them. First off, I think everyone should move out after college, but secondly, your entire situation sounds bad and this is compounding it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 10, 2012 Author Share Posted August 10, 2012 This shouldn't be the reason you move out, just one of them. First off, I think everyone should move out after college, but secondly, your entire situation sounds bad and this is compounding it. Oh, I'm definitely moving out of college if I have the chance, 100%. It is horrible. Even during school I can't concentrate and do my school work because of the amount of arguments they have in the house Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TwoMinutesForNothing Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 My dad did something similar. Now he lives in California. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fuhgeddaboudit Posted August 11, 2012 Author Share Posted August 11, 2012 My dad did something similar. Now he lives in California. It's pretty annoying and it's actually killing me and my brother/sister Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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