siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 I don't know what spirit or godly entity thought that this was a good idea but we found out last week that the wife is preggers- around the 7-8 week mark at this point- still early. After freaking out for a few days I sat down and started doing a little bit of planning only to realize I don't know the first thing about babies. I have never been around one for more than a few minutes at a time and have never been alone with one never the less took care of one. So of course I am doing the responsible thing and asking the internet (here's a random thought.. i was 12ish when I started posting on the original Rangers forum and now I am having my own kid wtf). So gentlemen lay it on me.. what the hell am I in for? Anyone have an good recommendations on books to learn about pregnancy/baby care? Any must have baby product recommendations that will make life a lot easier? Seems like theres as ton of stuff out there but I assume most of it will not end up getting used. How the hell does insurance work in this instance? Her doc is in-network and so is the hospital technically but the caveat is that at the time of birth which ever doctor is available will do the delivery- Do I pay out of network charges on this? :confused: Looking at immediately opening some sort of savings account once I am able to... leaning towards doing an UGMA/UTMA custodial account vs. a 529 (what if they need money for stuff other than school down the line?) anyone have any input on this? Any advice from the dads on here? 3
Phil Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Congratulations and welcome to hell. We meet once a week, wives permitting, to remember the times we used to have sex without scheduling it weeks in advance.
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 Congratulations and welcome to hell. We meet once a week, wives permitting, to remember the times we used to have sex without scheduling it weeks in advance. :lol: If it makes you feel better we will also be looking for a house come September. I fully expect to lose all of my hair within the next year or so.
Phil Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Anyone have an good recommendations on books to learn about pregnancy/baby care? Not really. You can read books if you want to (I can ask my wife what she read), but parenting eventually comes naturally. Figure it out as you go. Any must have baby product recommendations that will make life a lot easier? Seems like theres as ton of stuff out there but I assume most of it will not end up getting used. Your wife will decide all of this. Agree with her. Your life will be a lot easier. How the hell does insurance work in this instance? Her doc is in-network and so is the hospital technically but the caveat is that at the time of birth which ever doctor is available will do the delivery- Do I pay out of network charges on this? :confused: Nah, you shouldn't be. Her doc works with the hospital, so the other docs likely do, too. Looking at immediately opening some sort of savings account once I am able to... leaning towards doing an UGMA/UTMA custodial account vs. a 529 (what if they need money for stuff other than school down the line?) anyone have any input on this? Not on these specific things, but I suggest immediately signing up for an Acorns account. You can actually set up your own investment account as well as individual ones for kids. The kids one will grow without you even looking at it basically ever. Any advice from the dads on here? Accept any help you're offered. Kids are simultaneously the greatest and worst things on earth. They can really grind away at your sanity, especially when they're old enough to throw full-blown temper tantrums. Parents/friends offer to watch 'em? Take it. Family/friends offer second-hand stuff? Wife-willing, accept it. Kids shit is fucking expensive and gets used for like two months before it's useless. You'll waste literally thousands of dollars on all sorts of meaningless shit you won't even remember years later. Oh, and get snipped. If you think one is bad, just wait until she tells you she's got another one baking. Then you're really fucked. 1
josh Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Put the most expensive shit on the baby registry. People wan to buy you stuff.
josh Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Convince your wife that getting up and breastfeeding in the middle of the night will help her bond with the kid.
Ozzy Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Another thread about someone letting in a softy? :rofl: Congratulations man!!!! That's great to hear, Nashty!!!! It's nowhere near anything a career single guy like me knows anything about....kinda like that Soccer thread in the Other Sports forum, but I wish you guys nothing but the best!!! :thumbs:
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 Not really. You can read books if you want to (I can ask my wife what she read), but parenting eventually comes naturally. Figure it out as you go. You can call me Jon Snow when it comes to babies I literally know next to nothing. If she has any recommendations they would be highly appreciated. Your wife will decide all of this. Agree with her. Your life will be a lot easier. So just like the rest of being married? Not on these specific things, but I suggest immediately signing up for an Acorns account. You can actually set up your own investment account as well as individual ones for kids. The kids one will grow without you even looking at it basically ever. Hmm.. ill look into acorns but i remember looking into it a while back and the maintenance fee's or the expense ratio or something didn't sit right with me. Ill look into it again though maybe I am remembering wrong. Accept any help you're offered. Kids are simultaneously the greatest and worst things on earth. They can really grind away at your sanity, especially when they're old enough to throw full-blown temper tantrums. Parents/friends offer to watch 'em? Take it. Family/friends offer second-hand stuff? Wife-willing, accept it. Kids shit is fucking expensive and gets used for like two months before it's useless. You'll waste literally thousands of dollars on all sorts of meaningless shit you won't even remember years later. Oh, and get snipped. If you think one is bad, just wait until she tells you she's got another one baking. Then you're really fucked. I think my wife would kill me if I even suggested the idea of having a 2nd child and shes barely pregnant. But who knows what happens in the future. Will most definitely try and get some second hand stuff- never understood why parents spent fortunes on things they're only going to use for a few months. Thanks for the advice! Put the most expensive shit on the baby registry. People wan to buy you stuff. Smart! We didnt do a registry for our wedding (asked for cash to help pay for the wedding) so this may be the way to go.
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 Convince your wife that getting up and breastfeeding in the middle of the night will help her bond with the kid. LMAO!! To be honest this is the part that scares me the most about all of this. I am NOT good with lack of sleep and neither is my wife. :rofl: Congratulations man!!!! That's great to hear, Nashty!!!! It's nowhere near anything a career single guy like me knows anything about....kinda like that Soccer thread in the Other Sports forum, but I wish you guys nothing but the best!!! :thumbs: Thanks Ozzy! You can babysit any time :rofl:
Vodka Drunkenski Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Congratulations and welcome to hell. We meet once a week, wives permitting, to remember the times we used to have sex without scheduling it weeks in advance. Please note: the schedule isn’t guaranteed Congrats
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 Please note: the schedule isn’t guaranteed Congrats Theres always the internet I guess thanks dude!
Phil Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Put the most expensive shit on the baby registry. People wan to buy you stuff. This, too. This absolutely falls under the "accept all help" reco.
Phil Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 LMAO!! To be honest this is the part that scares me the most about all of this. I am NOT good with lack of sleep and neither is my wife. You'll figure it out, but she'll bear the brunt of it if you guys do breastfeed.
josh Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 In the hospital, if they offer to take the baby (sleep, checks, etc) you let them. You’ll/she’ll never sleep again. Go for the epidural. Those diaper garbage cans don’t work. Pumpkin guts are great to combat diaper shit smell.
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 In the hospital, if they offer to take the baby (sleep, checks, etc) you let them. You’ll/she’ll never sleep again. Go for the epidural. Those diaper garbage cans don’t work. Pumpkin guts are great to combat diaper shit smell. Haha yes to the first two points- we have already established we will go for that. Good to know about the garbage cans. You'll figure it out, but she'll bear the brunt of it if you guys do breastfeed. Not sure about that yet but I assume she will want to. Poor girl is already getting all the bad pregnancy stuff.
josh Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 I don’t know your vehicle situation, but I suggest buying a carrier combo that has car seat (buy an additional base for additional cars. - including grandparents, don’t buy additional car seats/carriers), strollers clip ins, etc Again, put that shit on the registry. Make everyone bring diapers to the baby shower.
Phil Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 You can call me Jon Snow when it comes to babies I literally know next to nothing. If she has any recommendations they would be highly appreciated. She said she'll get back to me. She has to go back and look at what she read. So just like the rest of being married? Yes, but this is worse. Trust me, just agree, but not in a way that'll start a fight. When she says "I think I really like the Baby Rocker 3000," just say something like "oh, yeah, I was reading reviews on that — it sounds perfect." Hmm.. ill look into acorns but i remember looking into it a while back and the maintenance fee's or the expense ratio or something didn't sit right with me. Ill look into it again though maybe I am remembering wrong. I mean, it doesn't have to be Acorns specifically. There are tons of apps just like this. What I'm suggesting is start some kind of growth fund now and just forget about it. 18 years from now you'll be like "holy fuck, yes!" I think my wife would kill me if I even suggested the idea of having a 2nd child and shes barely pregnant. But who knows what happens in the future. Will most definitely try and get some second hand stuff- never understood why parents spent fortunes on things they're only going to use for a few months. Thanks for the advice! My wife once told me she was never getting married, and then told me she was never having kids, and then told me she was never having a second kid. If she wants another one, you're having one. As men, we're incapable of saying no to a "free nut." We just pay for it for the rest of our lives. Oh, that reminds me — biggest reco I can make: have all the sex you can now. You won't be having any for at least eight weeks after the birth, and whatever your current sex life is like, it's going to get halved, at best for the months following.
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 I don’t know your vehicle situation, but I suggest buying a carrier combo that has car seat (buy an additional base for additional cars. - including grandparents, don’t buy additional car seats/carriers), strollers clip ins, etc Again, put that shit on the registry. Make everyone bring diapers to the baby shower. Any brand recommendation or are they more or less all decent?
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 She said she'll get back to me. She has to go back and look at what she read. Yes, but this is worse. Trust me, just agree, but not in a way that'll start a fight. When she says "I think I really like the Baby Rocker 3000," just say something like "oh, yeah, I was reading reviews on that — it sounds perfect." I mean, it doesn't have to be Acorns specifically. There are tons of apps just like this. What I'm suggesting is start some kind of growth fund now and just forget about it. 18 years from now you'll be like "holy fuck, yes!" My wife once told me she was never getting married, and then told me she was never having kids, and then told me she was never having a second kid. If she wants another one, you're having one. As men, we're incapable of saying no to a "free nut." We just pay for it for the rest of our lives. Oh, that reminds me — biggest reco I can make: have all the sex you can now. You won't be having any for at least eight weeks after the birth, and whatever your current sex life is like, it's going to get halved, at best for the months following. All good no rush on the book. Read you loud and clear on the agreeing. Gotcha on the acorn thing- thats why I asked. I got into investing and stuff in my late 20's and have done decently well considering I just throw a few bucks in at a time- cant help but think what my life would be like now had my parents done this for from birth so I definitely want to do that for my kid. Had one or two people recommend 529 but I just dont like the idea that its meant for school only (10% penalty or something if you withdraw it for any other purpose or something along those lines) so I wanted to see if anyone had any thoughts that would change my mind. Fair enough- Ideally i'd like two kids but with her health not being ideal I think even having the 1 will be pushing it. I may get snipped afterwards just to be sure though. The rest of your comment isnt a surprise to me but will certainly make things harder (no pun intended) going forward.
BrooksBurner Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Don't buy a shit ton of baby clothes. They grow out fast and I have found it people's favorite thing to just randomly buy or give you so you collect them that way too. Not saying don't buy a few items that you love (Rangers onesie???), but we have a bucket of clothes we didn't/couldn't even use
Phil Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 Don't buy a shit ton of baby clothes. They grow out fast and I have found it people's favorite thing to just randomly buy or give you so you collect them that way too. Not saying don't buy a few items that you love (Rangers onesie???), but we have a bucket of clothes we didn't/couldn't even use Yup. Buy a few things you really like, but don't make a habit of it. Grandparents and family will spoil the shit out of the kid, especially if it is their first grand child. If you have older family/siblings/cousins, they'll be eager to hand you down buckets full of stuff, too.
siddious Posted June 16, 2021 Author Posted June 16, 2021 Yup. Buy a few things you really like, but don't make a habit of it. Grandparents and family will spoil the shit out of the kid, especially if it is their first grand child. If you have older family/siblings/cousins, they'll be eager to hand you down buckets full of stuff, too. Don't buy a shit ton of baby clothes. They grow out fast and I have found it people's favorite thing to just randomly buy or give you so you collect them that way too. Not saying don't buy a few items that you love (Rangers onesie???), but we have a bucket of clothes we didn't/couldn't even use We do have older siblings/family but most either have older kids or they will have to split stuff between us and my brother in law/his wife who is also pregnant at the moment. With that said between my parents and my wifes we should get a ton of stuff. A ranger onesie is def. on the BUY list.
Dunny Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 I dunno, I have three kids, I work the job I want, and pay for all their lives, and in return, I get laid regularly, and I'm golfing every weekend. Piece of piss. There is a manual for this success, just watch "A Handmaid's Tale" for step by step instructions, and threaten her that you're thinking of going full Mennonite. Life is good.
BrooksBurner Posted June 16, 2021 Posted June 16, 2021 I dunno, I have three kids, I work the job I want, and pay for all their lives, and in return, I get laid regularly, and I'm golfing every weekend. Piece of piss. There is a manual for this success, just watch "A Handmaid's Tale" for step by step instructions, and threaten her that you're thinking of going full Mennonite. Life is good. With who? How do you keep it secret?
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