twentyseven Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I need a place to vent about this nonsense! I am getting married in exactly 1 year and I have to say this whole wedding business is driving me insane. It is disgusting at how much people charge you for this special day. I love my fiance and she means everything to me but putting down 5 figures for a fucking 6 hour is nauseating. I can think of so much more practical things to put that money towards than a 6 hour party. Like, oh I don't know... a down payment towards a HOUSE? We can't even have an evening wedding because of the insane prices. We are getting married at Crest Hallow and found out that after tax and gratuity, an evening wedding costs 170 pp, while an afternoon wedding costs 78 pp. So we decided to go with the afternoon wedding. In July. I hate the summer. With my luck it will be today's temperature of 97 degrees. Then there are the mother fucking vendors!!!! This asshole had the gall to ask me if I was interested in their $10,000 photography package. I don't know about you guys but on my teacher's salary there is no way in heck I can afford a 10k photography package. I am also paying this out of my own pocket because I don't want to hassle my parents and it means a lot to me to be able to do this myself. Too much money going out, too little coming in. /rant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I feel your pain, dude. We're still paying for pieces of our wedding, and we had both my parents and hers donate well over $10,000 to us to help us pay for it all. The cost is absurd for a party that's not even for you. It's for your guests. You wanna talk venting? The average "gift" at a wedding is about $100, including for couples (meaning $50 a person), while the cost to put their plate of food down is actually over $100. You lose money in having them there. :rofl: $78 per person is a steal though. I paid around $120 a plate for mine. You are also getting married in "wedding season", so that $78 is a really low number. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twentyseven Posted July 19, 2013 Author Share Posted July 19, 2013 I feel your pain, dude. We're still paying for pieces of our wedding, and we had both my parents and hers donate well over $10,000 to us to help us pay for it all. The cost is absurd for a party that's not even for you. It's for your guests. You wanna talk venting? The average "gift" at a wedding is about $100, including for couples (meaning $50 a person), while the cost to put their plate of food down is actually over $100. You lose money in having them there. :rofl: $78 per person is a steal though. I paid around $120 a plate for mine. You are also getting married in "wedding season", so that $78 is a really low number. Yeah... I think the reason why that number is so low is because we are the only couple dumb enough to have an afternoon wedding in July. I'm gonna be sweating balls and probably gonna be really grumpy that day LOL. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I assure you, you're not. "Wedding season" runs from basically June to September. June is the biggest month, obviously. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Heaven Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I actually think May and September are the 2 biggest months for weddings. I got married on a Sunday afternoon. Price was just about $100 pp cheaper than Saturday night. I agree with Rome, you put down X amount of $$$ and for the most part you dont get the same in return from 90% of the guests. Close family members and close friends may give you more then what it costs per plate. I got married 3 years ago and I still didnt even get anything from 3 guests. One guest really disappointed me b/c she has booked events for our company and knows how much this shit costs and what did we get? $50 gift card to Union Square Hospitality Group (Danny Meyers restaurants). That $50 only paid for 1/4th of dinner at the Union Square Cafe. Everyone says the wedding day is for the bride, bullshit, its for the guests. I could go on and on about this shit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twentyseven Posted July 19, 2013 Author Share Posted July 19, 2013 Yeah, it definitely is for the guests. I don't even mind forking out the cash for the event. The problem I have is some of these sharks that come out and charge an arm and a leg for what is supposed to be one of the biggest events of your life. Nothing like putting yourself in the hole 5 digits to start out your life together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phil Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 Yeah, it definitely is for the guests. I don't even mind forking out the cash for the event. The problem I have is some of these sharks that come out and charge an arm and a leg for what is supposed to be one of the biggest events of your life. Nothing like putting yourself in the hole 5 digits to start out your life together. Sure, not to mention the cost of the irrelevant stone on her finger to boot. Don't get me started on diamonds. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twentyseven Posted July 19, 2013 Author Share Posted July 19, 2013 Sure, not to mention the cost of the irrelevant stone on her finger to boot. Don't get me started on diamonds. ;) haha, I got lucky with that part. My mom wanted me to give my fiance her engagement ring. So I saved $$$ that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I won't even tell you how much my per plate was. But I got help from my in laws. We still paid 7k for photos and video, 3500 for the DJ, $4k for flowers, then the shuttle, the breakfast the next day, the bags for people who stayed over and favors. You know what? It was all worth it. It was the best night of my life and people tell me it was the best wedding they ever went to. So fuck it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twentyseven Posted July 19, 2013 Author Share Posted July 19, 2013 I won't even tell you how much my per plate was. But I got help from my in laws. We still paid 7k for photos and video, 3500 for the DJ, $4k for flowers, then the shuttle, the breakfast the next day, the bags for people who stayed over and favors. You know what? It was all worth it. It was the best night of my life and people tell me it was the best wedding they ever went to. So fuck it. I'm glad it worked out for you and you enjoyed it! I'd still rather take all that money and put it towards a house. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I said the same shit. But its going to happen. Best advice I can give is ride the wave and enjoy it. It's out of your control. Better to look at it positively than negatively. Wait til you do invites and seating arrangements. :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Heaven Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 I said the same shit. But its going to happen. Best advice I can give is ride the wave and enjoy it. It's out of your control. Better to look at it positively than negatively. Wait til you do invites and seating arrangements. :D Gotta agree with Peetie. We all wish we could have use the $$$ towards something more important like a new house. Make the best of the situation and try and enjoy the process. Fortunately for me it was pretty easy, my wife knew what she wanted, I nodded my head yes as long as it was feasible in our budget. In turn, she gave me complete control over the music that was played by the DJ, Honeymoon, and wedding cake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted July 19, 2013 Share Posted July 19, 2013 Same. I picked all the songs everyone walked out to, our wedding song, only song she picked was her dance with her dad. I helped with flowers when she was stumped because I'm good with color. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twentyseven Posted July 19, 2013 Author Share Posted July 19, 2013 Honestly, one of the things I am really worried about is taking the pictures. It is going to be about 1-2pm in July and I will be wearing a black tuxedo and I sweat like a pig. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shane Falco Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 I need a place to vent about this nonsense! I am getting married in exactly 1 year and I have to say this whole wedding business is driving me insane. It is disgusting at how much people charge you for this special day. I love my fiance and she means everything to me but putting down 5 figures for a fucking 6 hour is nauseating. I can think of so much more practical things to put that money towards than a 6 hour party. Like, oh I don't know... a down payment towards a HOUSE? We can't even have an evening wedding because of the insane prices. We are getting married at Crest Hallow and found out that after tax and gratuity, an evening wedding costs 170 pp, while an afternoon wedding costs 78 pp. So we decided to go with the afternoon wedding. In July. I hate the summer. With my luck it will be today's temperature of 97 degrees. Then there are the mother fucking vendors!!!! This asshole had the gall to ask me if I was interested in their $10,000 photography package. I don't know about you guys but on my teacher's salary there is no way in heck I can afford a 10k photography package. I am also paying this out of my own pocket because I don't want to hassle my parents and it means a lot to me to be able to do this myself. Too much money going out, too little coming in. /rant A summer wedding? I'd lose it. There's no way I would cough up all that money to sweat my balls off in a suit all day. I understand your reasons, but damn dude. Here's a question that I have for those getting married or who already are? Why a big wedding? (assuming that it is) I've always envisioned a small one for myself. Nothing crazy just close friends and family. Not friends of friends and all that extra crap. Come to think of it though, do the guys get much of a say in that department? :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 Nope. We had 250 people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twentyseven Posted July 20, 2013 Author Share Posted July 20, 2013 I don't think 120 is a lot of people, I think that is more medium size Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dude Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 Crest Hollow is really fucking nice though. It's beautiful. Sadly you're having it in the afternoon. At night with the whole pool area and everything is lit up and really makes a nice environment. I'm sure its expensive as fuck though. Standard wedding gift should be atleast $100 per plate/ person. If I can't afford to give that as a gift, I don't go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twentyseven Posted July 20, 2013 Author Share Posted July 20, 2013 Crest Hollow is really fucking nice though. It's beautiful. Sadly you're having it in the afternoon. At night with the whole pool area and everything is lit up and really makes a nice environment. I'm sure its expensive as fuck though. Standard wedding gift should be atleast $100 per plate/ person. If I can't afford to give that as a gift, I don't go. Yeah at night it is beautiful, and it is still nice in the afternoon. That being said, I am not willing to spend over 100 more per person for ambiance lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dunny Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 I think you city folk get screwed on venue. Y'all seem to be hung up on it. Why can't you rent a community hall or something like that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aasjs Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 I won't even tell you how much my per plate was. But I got help from my in laws. We still paid 7k for photos and video, 3500 for the DJ, $4k for flowers, then the shuttle, the breakfast the next day, the bags for people who stayed over and favors. You know what? It was all worth it. It was the best night of my life and people tell me it was the best wedding they ever went to. So fuck it. I want to be able to say this. I don't necessarily want a big wedding in regards to the number of people who attend, but I want it to be a big celebration and a lot of fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parsley Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 Things that saved my ass: Small wedding (100 people total) Family friend as DJ (paid, but obviously with a discount) Not sure what was my bigger ripoff: -Florist -Photographer My wife went apeshit on the flowers and in the end they look nice, but are primarily a waste Photographer, while "ok" got way more $ than the end product deserved Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Dude Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 My g/f used to work for a DJ company. My god the shit they would get people to spend money on... Thousands of dollars to hang what are essentially sheets to divide a room and add pretty reflective lighting effect. If anyone has the money and the lack of morals, along with the ability to tell lame hack jokes, do the electric slide.and all bullshit along with ability to make or hang lighting, hit play on a laptop......open up a DJ company and make a killing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 I think you city folk get screwed on venue. Y'all seem to be hung up on it. Why can't you rent a community hall or something like that? It's mostly the tri-state area that is crazy like this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pete Posted July 20, 2013 Share Posted July 20, 2013 I want to be able to say this. I don't necessarily want a big wedding in regards to the number of people who attend, but I want it to be a big celebration and a lot of fun. Our wedding was basically a club. My buddy's wife said all she needed was a hit of ecstasy and she'd have felt like it was college all over again. Amazing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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