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What Do You Do Confidently Now That Made You Feel Weird/Nervous in the Past?


Phil

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Stealing this from Reddit.

 

For me, it's 100% public speaking, which manifests in presenting work directly to clients. I used to dread it, and there's always a nervous tinge before the speaking is tossed to me, but compared to even a few years ago, its light and day.

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I'm probably in the same boat with speaking, and still am to some degree, but it's been forced on me so many times that, if I'm really prepared, I enjoy it.

 

But really, it's a 60 degree wedge. I was terrified of it, now it's a weapon.

 

Similar actually... bunker shots. I feel way more comfortable playing out of a bunker since I watched a Jason Day tutorial video a year ago. I use my 60 degree for them, open the club face, and pop that shit out.

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Bees. I was stung as a kid and never quite got over it...along with a fear of needles. Now, my work with foreclosed homes sees me opening screen doors and windows that have been shut for years and there are always hives to deal with. Just this week, I came across 2 homes that have very active hives (dangerously large ones) embedded in the wall through a rotted window frame. The 'flight path' in and out of that house that I watched from a safe distance was awe inspiring. I've overcome the fear now because I've had to.
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Similar actually... bunker shots. I feel way more comfortable playing out of a bunker since I watched a Jason Day tutorial video a year ago. I use my 60 degree for them, open the club face, and pop that shit out.

 

Good point, you get to see why they don't give a fuck about bunkers.

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Bees. I was stung as a kid and never quite got over it...along with a fear of needles. Now, my work with foreclosed homes sees me opening screen doors and windows that have been shut for years and there are always hives to deal with. Just this week, I came across 2 homes that have very active hives (dangerously large ones) embedded in the wall through a rotted window frame. The 'flight path' in and out of that house that I watched from a safe distance was awe inspiring. I've overcome the fear now because I've had to.

 

FUCK anything with a stinger and especially those dangley-legged mother fuckers. They're fucking frightening.

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FUCK anything with a stinger and especially those dangley-legged mother fuckers. They're fucking frightening.

 

I hear you man! My first encounter with my auction work was in front of about 30 people waiting for me to 'break in' so we could show the home. I opened the screen door and the nest was the size of a pizza box and they got pissed quickly. I managed not to get stung and closed the door fast. I used to have the usual RAID spray but that's crap. I buy this die-electric stuff from Home Depot by the case. It shoots 20-feet and they are done instantly. I've learned three things: 1) bees get angry fast, 2) wasps are already angry and 3) hornets are the fucking worst - they are in full-on pissed mode all of the time. Don't frig' with them.

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Appear in court. I used to feel like a total dilettante, like I was a kid wearing his daddy's clothes and his dad's friends all thought it was funny. Found judges and basically every adversary intimidating. Got a pit in my stomach every time I saw an in-court appearance on the schedule. Felt sick driving to court every time.

 

The more I did it, the more I realized a couple of things:

(1) There's no substitute for the relationships that only come with time. The people that fare the best are the ones who are all friendly with each other.

(2) Many of the adversaries are also faking it until they make it. Bluster and righteous indignation go a long way in their minds. Doesn't mean they're smart, or well-prepared. In fact, generally it's the opposite. I find the screaming and yelling hilarious now and make it a point to fuck with them. I once said to one guy, after he told me my case was going to get kicked for failure to comply with discovery and that I should just settle, "Wow...it sounds like I'm really in a pickle. What do you recommend I do?" He thought I was completely serious. I can actually take advantage of my youthful look (I'm older than I look) to portray a Bambi-like vibe and then steamroll them on the record. Most never see it coming. Some fell for it multiple times.

(3) Many judges are regular people who believe they're just doing a job. Some are drunk on power, but it's not as bad as I thought. Be succinct and to the point, and nobody cares.

(4) Along that same line, everyone is just doing their job. The less fixated you are with the concepts of winning and losing, the less personal it is for you. When you get home, it's time to stop thinking about it until the next morning. Also, the legal profession disproportionately both attracts and rewards mental illness.

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This is kind of a heavy one so feel free to skip it.

 

After suffering the unexpected loss of my wife in 2016 after nearly 30 years together and then an accident in 2018 which left me with a life altering anoxic brain injury it's depression. Dealing with it and living with it were virtually impossible and there was no light at the end of the tunnel. The only reason to get out of bed every day was because my daughter had seen enough pain through the loss of her mom and then 2 weeks of being told I would never wake up and if I did the odds of me even knowing who she was was slim and none. Anyway for months on end when I would close my eyes at night I would of been fine if I never opened them again.

 

I was passed around from Dr to Dr for over a year and finally landed at a brain injury center neuro rehab which has saved my life. I was embarrassed of my cognitive challenges as a result of the brain injuries. Unable to do the things I had done my entire career. Unable to do things that I and I bet everyone here takes for granted every minute of every day. The official diagnosis is Executive Function Disorder. Anyway through a shit ton of one on one ongoing cognitive therapy sessions and weekly group sessions I am now able to lead many of the group sessions because I have come to accept the challenges and many who are way worse off than I am look to me for advice which gives me a sense of purpose.

 

I can hide behind this keyboard with the best of them. But for someone that use to work at a SR VP level in the city in the financial district and had to regularly talk in front of 100 or more every quarter I became someone that could not have a one on one conversation. Someone that had to learn how to walk and talk again. I could not use my arms or hands for two months. My hands are still on fire and will be for the rest of my life, my headaches make my head feel like it's going to explode. And yeah sometimes my brain can't keep up with following the action of a hockey game especially in person. My conversations with people are sometimes awkward at best because I fear I'm going to say something stupid or lose track of what I'm trying or wanting to say.

 

So the answer for me is this - I can admit it freely now living with a brain injury is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. However by opening up and talking about it I've been able to help others who are at the point of not wanting to wake up when they close their eyes. SO instead of living with the embarrassment I choose to put it all out there hoping that it may help others and even make it easier for me to breathe even if it's just for a few hours.

 

 

oh and another vote for the left hand as well.

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This is kind of a heavy one so feel free to skip it.

 

After suffering the unexpected loss of my wife in 2016 after nearly 30 years together and then an accident in 2018 which left me with a life altering anoxic brain injury it's depression. Dealing with it and living with it were virtually impossible and there was no light at the end of the tunnel. The only reason to get out of bed every day was because my daughter had seen enough pain through the loss of her mom and then 2 weeks of being told I would never wake up and if I did the odds of me even knowing who she was was slim and none. Anyway for months on end when I would close my eyes at night I would of been fine if I never opened them again.

 

I was passed around from Dr to Dr for over a year and finally landed at a brain injury center neuro rehab which has saved my life. I was embarrassed of my cognitive challenges as a result of the brain injuries. Unable to do the things I had done my entire career. Unable to do things that I and I bet everyone here takes for granted every minute of every day. The official diagnosis is Executive Function Disorder. Anyway through a shit ton of one on one ongoing cognitive therapy sessions and weekly group sessions I am now able to lead many of the group sessions because I have come to accept the challenges and many who are way worse off than I am look to me for advice which gives me a sense of purpose.

 

I can hide behind this keyboard with the best of them. But for someone that use to work at a SR VP level in the city in the financial district and had to regularly talk in front of 100 or more every quarter I became someone that could not have a one on one conversation. Someone that had to learn how to walk and talk again. I could not use my arms or hands for two months. My hands are still on fire and will be for the rest of my life, my headaches make my head feel like it's going to explode. And yeah sometimes my brain can't keep up with following the action of a hockey game especially in person. My conversations with people are sometimes awkward at best because I fear I'm going to say something stupid or lose track of what I'm trying or wanting to say.

 

So the answer for me is this - I can admit it freely now living with a brain injury is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. However by opening up and talking about it I've been able to help others who are at the point of not wanting to wake up when they close their eyes. SO instead of living with the embarrassment I choose to put it all out there hoping that it may help others and even make it easier for me to breathe even if it's just for a few hours.

 

 

oh and another vote for the left hand as well.

Thanks for sharing. :clap:

Powerful, and real life.

 

No offense to the golfers.

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nah man I'm happy for anybody that doesn't have heavy demons that they carry with them every day! I think a lot of people in todays society have real demons and struggles, very few are blessed to not carry some kind of weight on their shoulders. I find this place a much needed relief from mine, the banter and back and forth a break from real life and the cruelty that can make it's way into our lives at any time. The one thing I've learned is never take your health or your love ones for granted it's the most precious gift of all. Everything else is house money. Thanks for playing along and that's no joke when I say it.
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This is kind of a heavy one so feel free to skip it.

 

After suffering the unexpected loss of my wife in 2016 after nearly 30 years together and then an accident in 2018 which left me with a life altering anoxic brain injury it's depression. Dealing with it and living with it were virtually impossible and there was no light at the end of the tunnel. The only reason to get out of bed every day was because my daughter had seen enough pain through the loss of her mom and then 2 weeks of being told I would never wake up and if I did the odds of me even knowing who she was was slim and none. Anyway for months on end when I would close my eyes at night I would of been fine if I never opened them again.

 

I was passed around from Dr to Dr for over a year and finally landed at a brain injury center neuro rehab which has saved my life. I was embarrassed of my cognitive challenges as a result of the brain injuries. Unable to do the things I had done my entire career. Unable to do things that I and I bet everyone here takes for granted every minute of every day. The official diagnosis is Executive Function Disorder. Anyway through a shit ton of one on one ongoing cognitive therapy sessions and weekly group sessions I am now able to lead many of the group sessions because I have come to accept the challenges and many who are way worse off than I am look to me for advice which gives me a sense of purpose.

 

I can hide behind this keyboard with the best of them. But for someone that use to work at a SR VP level in the city in the financial district and had to regularly talk in front of 100 or more every quarter I became someone that could not have a one on one conversation. Someone that had to learn how to walk and talk again. I could not use my arms or hands for two months. My hands are still on fire and will be for the rest of my life, my headaches make my head feel like it's going to explode. And yeah sometimes my brain can't keep up with following the action of a hockey game especially in person. My conversations with people are sometimes awkward at best because I fear I'm going to say something stupid or lose track of what I'm trying or wanting to say.

 

So the answer for me is this - I can admit it freely now living with a brain injury is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. However by opening up and talking about it I've been able to help others who are at the point of not wanting to wake up when they close their eyes. SO instead of living with the embarrassment I choose to put it all out there hoping that it may help others and even make it easier for me to breathe even if it's just for a few hours.

 

 

oh and another vote for the left hand as well.

Wow. Very powerful stuff. I admire your ability to overcome and survive. There’s a special place for anyone that has been through everything you have.

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