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Which Would You Rather Fight — Land Edition


Phil

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a male lion, generally pretty lazy especially compared to a female, most worried about teeth, my choice. gorilla silver back super strong, teeth, notoriously bad tempered. no way i want the polar bear with those claws teeth size, plus fighting on ice snow cold. want no part of bleeding wounds and shredded clothing when it’s minus twenty
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a male lion, generally pretty lazy especially compared to a female, most worried about teeth, my choice. gorilla silver back super strong, teeth, notoriously bad tempered. no way i want the polar bear with those claws teeth size, plus fighting on ice snow cold. want no part of bleeding wounds and shredded clothing when it?s minus twenty
Fight location wasn't specified. ;-)
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I'm taking the gorilla. If I'm going to die, I think I'd rather get my head bashed quick and knocked unconcious instead of the alternative of getting shredded open by claws and teeth.

 

Worrying about "odds" here is like having better odds to hit the Powerball jackpot instead of the Mega Millions. Yeah, they're technically better, but does it really matter?

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Polar bear can take down a Grizzly, and despite what Captain Planet says above, population is doing better than fine.

 

I'll go with Lion.

Captain planet? All counter with, we all know you never step foot in Africa.
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The point is that no option is a good one. I'm going lion too, for the record. Polar bear is guaranteed death over a long, drawn out period of time in which it'll likely eat you legs first. Fuck. That. The gorilla won't just kill you, but might violate you in the process. Double. Fuck. That.

 

At the very least, if/when the lion gets the best of me, it's one or two good chomps before it finds my carotid, and ends me quick.

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